The reasons why many modern women don’t want children.

Ever since I was young, I never had a strong desire to be a mother. I still don’t. Whilst I would never rule out having kids completely and I wouldn’t go as far as having my tubes tied, I’m leaning more towards not having them than having them. I would only have kids under certain conditions including having enough money to go through IVF (my brother was born with a very rare brain tumor and as a consequence is severely disabled- I don’t want to have a severely disabled child that will suffer), to have an elective caesarean, post-natal cosmetic surgical procedures if needed, and to hire help for the child so I can work and enjoy some freedom. These may seem unreasonable to many people, but perhaps you will understand my reasons as you read on. Research shows that more and more women are choosing not to have children and I’m not surprised. Here are the reasons why women are choosing not to have kids.

1. We are expected to give up our freedom and identity.

In society, mothers are still expected to sacrifice far more than fathers. Women are still expected to be the primary caregiver and do the large bulk of the childcare. It seems that once women become mothers, the person that they were before having kids goes out of the window and their lives revolve only around the kids. It’s expected that mothers are constantly with their children and are made to feel guilty for wanting to have an identity and time outside of motherhood which leads to my next point.

2. Mothers are judged harshly.

No wonder less women want to become mothers with all of the judgement out there. There are gross double standards between mothers and fathers. It’s acceptable for a father to go out with his friends and leave the kids at home with mum, but if a woman goes out with her friends or has time for herself, the Mommy Nazis express their horror that she can be without her child (even though the child is being cared for by a responsible adult) and that she’s so selfish. Women who don’t breastfeed are judged harshly and every single thing a mother does is scrutinized…